Terraza 7
Posted: July 24, 2012 Filed under: Queens | Tags: TUESDAY TOILET TALK 3 Comments »9:53pm – Twenty-three minutes after the jam session should have started, there was still no sign of any live music about to happen at Terraza 7 Live Music. I was wondering if they canceled the regular Sunday hang in observance of the Colombian Independence Day weekend when someone ran in and threw a lead sheet down on the keyboard bench. The other musicians followed shortly thereafter and the music finally started nearly an hour later than advertised. I guess they were just running on South American time. My friends and I showed up late to a Brazilian birthday party once and had to return after another hour or so because we were early.
Bassist John Benitez led the session with his son, drummer Francis Benitez (Colombia/Puerto Rico/Bronx), pianist Axel Tosca (Cuba), percussionist Eddie Muñoz (Dominican Republic) and another percussionist known simply as “Sebastian from Germany.” It was a good thing I had brushed up on my non-existent Spanish skills the night before by watching the Uruguayan film, El Baño del Papa (The Pope’s Toilet); John bantered and introduced the band entirely in Spanish, although he did say something about a drug-free stage and freedom in English.
Terraza Café had a relaxed, homey atmosphere with a hanging wire-mesh floor stage, level with the second floor. Lingering under the stage is not recommended, unless you are hoping for an accidental beer shower from above, which was in the forecast that night. Also, if you’ll be on stage, do not wear a skirt or a dress.
The sole bathroom was truly unisex in that it housed both a toilet and a urinal in the same space. The exposed pipe faucets fit the décor although they didn’t have the best action, making the water flow slightly difficult to control. 
Hanging paper towel and toilet paper rolls from the ceiling with twine worked for a venue like this, which also had a hammock hanging in the upstairs area. I wouldn’t call the bathroom clean but it did have character.
One of the few jazz spots in the Queens borough, this place exudes a genuine communal vibe, full of people from the neighborhood hanging out to listen and a friendly house band that personally yells out jam session participants by name to the stage. Plus you will undoubtedly pick up some Spanish and can put that to use buying a carne empanada down the street.
I was enjoying my empanada while waiting for the 7 at the Jackson Heights stop when a crazy man started trying to chat me up. To look occupied, I took out my notepad and was about to reach for my lead pencil when I thought to myself that I might have to stab him with my writing utensil. Then I grabbed a green ballpoint pen instead because I like my pencil and want to keep using it.
I think I’ve read one too many articles on weapon control and violence lately.
John Benitez tells us how to say, “Where’s the restroom?” in Spanish —
Iridium Jazz Club
Posted: July 10, 2012 Filed under: Midtown | Tags: TUESDAY TOILET TALK Comments Off on Iridium Jazz Club
Do you remember Hurricane Day in the city last summer? I showed up with nothing but the clothes on my back and a platter of assorted cheesecake in my hand to pianist Misha Piatigorsky’s place, at the kind invitation of drummer Chris Wabich. And that is how this refugee became acquainted with Sketchy Black Dog, a rhythm section plus string quartet ensemble that mixes classic rock and jazz.
I went to see Misha and Chris’s group again on Thursday at Iridium Jazz Club. Danton Boller joined them on bass and violinists Monica Davis and Adda Kridler, violist Colin Benn and cellist Agnes Nagy made up the quartet. Sketchy Black Dog’s nickname is Scratchy Black Cat and it used to go by Paris Troika, before adding the strings.
I’ve never noticed Iridium before because its presence is obscured by humongous signs advertising Mamma Mia! and Stardust Diner. The jazz club is downstairs from the diner, decked out in reddish blue décor with guitars and Les Paul posters hung all around. Their restroom was clean with three stalls that were roomy enough. And in case you weren’t sure if being a woman also qualified you as a lady, they had two signs on the door, one that said Ladies and another that said Women.
Hopefully you have a compact mirror on you to read the bathroom door handle, because it says “Pull” in mirror image reflection. Once you open the door, you might notice that the wall on the far right corner goes in. They stuck a small sink there, which was most adorable and the best feature of the room. They also had a standard size sink and more posters up on the walls. Iridium seems to be as fond of putting up decorations as my mom; every time I visit home, I have to take down a few plaques and trinkets.
My mom told me that when our family used to live on the East Coast and visited New York, we could only afford two bowls of jja-jang-myun (black bean noodle) to share among the four of us. I thought about this, what little money we had in the first decade of our life in the States and the change in lifestyle over the years, while I ordered and ate my $9 strawberry shortcake without flinching.
Misha, who also immigrated to the States at a young age, tells us how to say, “Where’s the restroom?” in Russian —
blue whale
Posted: June 26, 2012 Filed under: JAZZ TOILET USA | Tags: TUESDAY TOILET TALK 2 Comments »Last night I went to the most happening jazz club in Los Angeles, blue whale, for a show of original pop tunes, reharmonized standards and spoken word led by vocalist Joyce Kwon with pianist Matt Politano, bassist Dominic Thiroux and drummer Kevin McDonald. I almost thought I wouldn’t be able to make it because an abnormal swelling developed to the left of my throat, leaving me in pain for most of the weekend. It was humbling to realize that just like that, I could lose my voice and my livelihood. Music is an extreme sport.
For this special Los Angeles edition, we took the entire team of JAZZ TOILET correspondents. A small Asian girl like me with a Ken® doll may not have been so conspicuous at blue whale, at least according to one Yelp review which noted that there were too many inter-racial Asian female/ Caucasian male couples. Not only do you have to deal with issues that arise in relationships where a hegemonic culture merges with a minority culture, you have to deal with others who find it problematic. But perhaps it’s worth it.
Here’s a brief history of the ladies room at blue whale. The toilet used to have a rectangular seat but it has since been replaced by a conventional round shape. For a period in the past, there was a sticky note on the open toilet top that asked the patron to lift the lever up, because the external handle to flush was broken. That has been fixed and I also noticed that a new soap pump had been installed on a wall adjacent to the sink.
I’ve been curious to know why multiple men come out of the bathroom in succession if it is a single person restroom without stalls, like the ladies room. I haven’t known guys to flock to the bathroom in groups to hang and gossip so I wondered just what goes on inside. Our men’s room correspondent KMac demystified the situation with his investigative photography: there is a urinal and a toilet so that two people can use the room at once, even though there aren’t stalls with separate doors for privacy.
So that you don’t accuse me of yellow journalism, I enlisted the help of our West Coast correspondent, Eunice, to provide footage of toilet perspectives other than mine. Watch the clip below for interviews with blue whale patrons on how they would describe the restrooms.
The restrooms are indeed spacious, chic and modern, just like the rest of venue (that is, withholding the private disco room in the back). The club is impeccable, the music is killing and the concept, inspiring. But the standout feature of blue whale is the people. From Big John’s stern greeting at the door to Mitch’s generous concoctions at the bar to Joon’s sincere support for the musicians, I have not found a better club anywhere in all of my assignments.
The place holds countless treasured memories for this LA girl and I wish that I could be in multiple places at once, hanging at blue whale and living my life in NYC simultaneously. I think of blue whale each time I use the Shure Beta 87A that they gave me as my going away present, when I moved to New York almost a year ago. I may be biased but ask anyone else who has been and they will tell you that blue whale is a truly special place.
JAZZ TOILET presented the first best bathroom award last night to blue whale, with an official certificate and a placeholder trophy made of toilet paper rolls to tide them over until their prize of a case of 2-ply household rolls arrives. I would like to thank our sponsor, ToiletPaperWorld.com for providing the Charmin’ toilet paper. The heart of blue whale, owner Joon Lee tells us how to say, “Where’s the restroom?” in Korean —
Roulette
Posted: June 12, 2012 Filed under: Brooklyn | Tags: TUESDAY TOILET TALK Comments Off on RouletteYou’re not in Manhattan anymore, Dorothy …
It was just like the scene where she opens the door and steps out into Oz in full Technicolor, only I stepped into a huge restroom of black and white tiles. And I wasn’t wearing a blue gingham dress.
My jaw dropped at the sight of the seven stalls and three sinks in the clean women’s restroom, then once again at the separate wheelchair accessible ladies room. I had ample time to inspect the bathrooms before the SIM (School for Improvised Music) Big Band concert last Tuesday because everyone from the Facebook invite admin to the venue employees thought the show began at 8pm, except for the band, who thought it started at 8:30pm. The performance actually didn’t start until 8:38pm so everybody was wrong.
The Roulette in Brooklyn, it turns out, is more of a concert hall than a jazz club. They had a nice stage and balcony seating, with decor reminiscent of a Korean dermatologist or plastic surgeon’s office or a trendy Thai restaurant where the waiters wear dress shirts with ruffles.
I was particularly excited to hear saxophonist Andrew D’Angelo, one of the most inspirational and incredible musicians I have met. The alto player, wearing his little blue (and plaid) suede shoes, led the opening piece of the hour and forty-two minutes long set. The 17-piece all-star band, playing with synergistic energy, concluded the first piece and the audience responded with a “dot dot dot … question mark?” as my voice teacher would say.
“That was a song,” Andrew D’Angelo kindly informed us and we clapped enthusiastically on cue.
I liked that different musicians took turns conducting the big band tunes and enjoyed seeing SIM faculty, like Ralph Alessi and Andy Milne, for the first time since I attended their workshop a few winters ago. On my visit, I was impressed by the vast yet tightly knit music community in the city; I spotted Ravi Coltrane (also in the SIM big band), followed by another saxophonist, Peter Apfelbaum, while sitting around in the small music room of a local restaurant after a friend’s gig. Still, New York seemed to be full of cold people in cold weather and I knew I would only want to come again if I moved here and got plugged into a community.
And what wonderful communities I have found. Even so, I need a change of scenery and am due for a trip home to California. My sister messaged me over the weekend to let me know that she and my mom were “lying in the front yard on giant pieces of bubble wrap” because they were locked out of the house. I hope they have some bubble wrap left for me when I get home. Also, I am thrilled to be able to present a deluxe Los Angeles edition on the jazz club dearest to my heart during my brief visit. Brooklyn today and LA for the next issue—what’s next? JAZZ TOILET INTERNATIONAL?
The bari sax player from the big band, Israeli-American Michaël Attias tells us how to say, “Please, where’s the restroom?” in Hebrew —
Cornelia Street Cafe
Posted: May 22, 2012 Filed under: Greenwich Village | Tags: TUESDAY TOILET TALK Comments Off on Cornelia Street Cafe“Do you have a reservation?”
Yes—I did when we chatted about it at length ten minutes ago and that hasn’t changed, even though you gave away my seat. Dumbfounded by the host’s sincerely inquisitive expression, I concluded that he must either be affected by amnesia or not recognize me with my glasses on.
It’s amazing how one simple addition to a face, like glasses, bangs or facial hair can alter another’s perception of someone or summarize one’s existence. Dan Rufolo, the leader of Friday’s band at the Cornelia Street Cafe, had a beard that was in accordance with his composer-ly piano playing and driven compositions. The drummer, Arthur Vint’s mustache encapsulated his keen wit and amplified his cowboy vibe. The goatee on bassist Bill Thoman seemed only appropriate for his suspicious nature, in which he exclaimed that I was interrogating him and writing everything down.
If you look at the picture hanging in the restroom to the left, you will see three men and a woman donning facial hair to match their pirate garb in front of the cafe. Details like this make me appreciate not only the quaint restrooms, but all of Cornelia Street Cafe, especially the shoebox diorama-like performance space downstairs from the restaurant. From oversized Christmas lights hung around the exposed pipes, to mirrors framed like windows and open candle flames that would be in violation of the fire code in another city, the venue makes you feel welcome, even when the host forgets your face and the performer accuses you of being an informant with malicious intent.
Once you walk down the stairs to the performance area, make a left and you’ll see an arrow shaped sign that says “Restrooms” on the mirror wall. The arrow leads to two small, unmarked white doors at an adjacent angle. If they weren’t at a dead end, I would have taken longer to deduce that both must be doors to unisex restrooms.
The walls are at strange angles and the ceiling is very low so a tall person may have to crouch. Every time I go, I note their very thin toilet paper and cute little sink. Regarding the restroom on the right—the last I checked, the left tap is for hot water and the right, for hotter. Turn on both to get cooler, warm water from the faucet. Both restrooms are comparable in size and features.
The all-American band also featured trumpeter Nathan Eklund (beard) and saxophonist Rich Perry (clean-shaven), neither of whom spoke a language other than English. Bill offered his Mandarin skills but only knew how to say his name and other useless things, and not our key phrase. And thereafter, he continued to speak to me in elementary Chinese, possibly so that I could not transcribe or comprehend anything he said. Tucson native Arthur translated “Where’s the restroom?” with gusto in gringo Spanish and Dan, a third-generation Italian-American, double-checked the phrase on his iPhone so that he could ask us in Italian –